For everyone panicking about me getting dengue fever, fear not! I'm not getting disproportionately bitten by mosquitoes after all!
The hostel have called the anti bedbug people and put all of my stuff in plastic bags. But the hostel staff also suspect I might be having an allergic reaction to the bites because I'm so thoroughly covered and red and itchy, and they all seem to think it's not normal. I've never been bitten by bedbugs before, so I wouldn't know. But they match pictures online. Oh, and I found two dead ones and a live one in my bed, so there's that for evidence. They're so much bigger than I thought.
Nobody else has noticed bites yet though. If I picked them up somewhere, I'm not sure where. The bus to KL maybe? Even if I brought them they should have occupied the rest of the dorm by now. My other theory is that just like I'm a mosquito magnet, all the bedbugs are just hanging out with me and leaving everyone else alone, cos I taste so good. You're welcome.